


We Only Have Forever

by WitchVirus



Category: Star Trek
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Comfort, Crying, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hurt Spock, Hurt/Comfort, I'm Bad At Tagging, M/M, No Plot/Plotless, Star Trek - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-12
Updated: 2017-12-12
Packaged: 2019-02-13 17:28:38
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,384
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12988908
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WitchVirus/pseuds/WitchVirus
Summary: When Spock is faced with the strong emotion of hopelessness and sadness for the first time in his life, he is unaware of how to react or who to turn to. Kirk however, is by his side through everything.





	We Only Have Forever

**Author's Note:**

> Here's my first Star Trek story. It doesn't follow the plot of the movies, but of course it's influenced. I hope you all enjoy it! While writing this, my inspiration was the song "We Only Have Forever (Quiet)" by Lights & Motion. I highly recommend listening to it while reading, or some other time! Enjoy this little glimpse into their lives. :,) And of course, I do not own any of these wonderful characters (sadly).

The room was darkened.

Cool air circulated around the room, mirroring the emotions that had built up inside of his head.

Clammy hands clutched at the freshly made bed, the sheets crumpling within tired fists.

Peering out the window, the distressed Vulcan was not able to pinpoint what was creating this sense of.. sadness. Nor was he able to understand why he felt such a way, or how he felt this way.

His heart pumped blood through his body, and radiated emotion with each pulse. Eyes glued outside, he watched the stars. He did not watch one in particular, but all of them as a whole. He did not see stars as separate mystical beings with stories as humans so often did. He saw them as a mirror. If put together, they would be monstrous, and a terrifyingly confusing phenomenon. However when broken into the shards they were each night, they were simply beautiful pieces to a horrifying picture. That is how Spock saw himself. He felt like an isolated monster, hiding a hideous interior while showcasing a shining and seemingly perfect exterior.

With a sigh, the dark haired male pushed the sheets of the bed aside, and swung his slender legs over the left side of the bed. It creaked with his movement, causing him to wince. Placing his hands in his lap, he looked down at them. They were scarred, and showed signs of much struggle and victory. They showed war and peace. They showed love and sadness; two emotions he chose to hide, but felt quite often. The two emotions worked hand in hand in his mind, but tonight seemed to be choking him.

Spock felt the brim of his eyes fill, and a single tear escaped his left one. He did not dare move as the tear traveled the battlefield of his face, landing into his palm. As it did, he felt his breathing being constricted. Sniffling, he angrily wiped at his face before looking back up at the window. 

A reflection covered the stars. In an instant, however, it disappeared. The creator of the reflection had entered the room and shut out the light once more.

"Spock." A voice spoke. Delicate, and caring, and nothing harsh. The Vulcan did not turn to view his visitor, but simply nodded his head and cleared his throat.

The room was silent, and the air was still. The stars danced outside in the midnight sky, and seemed to mock him with their external glowing happiness.

"Spock." The voice repeated, and this time, caused Spock to look towards the direction of the sound. Taking a shaky breath to compose himself, he stood.

"I apologize. For my foolish behavior." He said, his cracked voice masked once again by false composer. His palms clasped behind his back as he regained his stance. Jim stepped closer to him. Spock could see he looked disappointed. "And, I apologize for causing your disappointment." He added.

Strong arms made their way around his own body. They were gentle and reassuring, nothing like war and hatred. 

He did not know how to react. His arms dangled awkwardly over Jim's. "I do not understand." He stated, looking confused.

The other male said nothing, and held on tighter. He was practically the same height as Spock, making his silent explanation easier. Moving his shoulders the slightest bit, he nudged the Vulcan's arms towards the direction his neck. Though the gesture was uncomfortable, Spock followed. He placed his trembling hands around his friend's neck. 

Spock felt warmth. Comfort. Relief. No need to hold onto the mask he created.

"Tell me what it is that troubles you, Spock. I'm here for you." Jim said, restating the information aloud that was explained through his embrace. For a moment Spock said nothing, for he truly didn't know what caused him pain. He yet again felt undeserving of this attention, and began to slip out of his friend's grasp.

Jim was too quick, however, and held on. 

"Please tell me. I want to help you and relieve your emotional pain any way I can." He said, pulling back only a moment to lock eyes with the upset male. 

His eyebrows drew together as he sighed. He shook his head, breaking the strong eye contact Jim had created. His friend's grip on his arms remained firm, but supportive.

"I.. do not know." He began, looking up into the other's bright eyes once more. "I do not understand the sadness that I am feeling. I was hoping.. maybe you could explain it." He said finally. Jim nodded, and led them back to where Spock had been previously sitting.

The two sat simultaneously, and the blonde haired male pulled the other to his chest with one arm. "Don't feel like you cannot come to me. I understand your confusion, and I want to comfort you." He explained, looking at the same stars Spock did earlier.

The Vulcan sighed and shook his head slowly, keeping his gaze down. "No, I do not deserve that." He stated simply, his lip quivering once.

"Spock.." Jim trailed off sadly, looking down at the other. "You deserve friendship, and love, and support unconditionally. What could possibly make you think you don't?" the blonde questioned. 

Spock paused, unaware of what to respond with. It had not occurred to him that he would ever deserve that. "I.. felt that receiving those kinds of gestures would be illogical for someone.. like me." He said, pausing only a few times. Again Jim had shook his head, looking up at the ceiling.

"God no.. never think that. I hope nobody has verbally told you that. It is not true, Spock. Just because you are different from humans, or not from this planet, or anything else, does not mean you should not receive the same type of attention." He spoke quietly, his own voice failing him at the last word.

Spock chewed the inside of his lip without realizing as he listened to his companion. He had never considered those thoughts, but was beginning to. "Would you provide me with those gestures? I would.. like to understand." He hesitated before finishing. "I want to believe I deserve them as well."

Jim nodded, wrapping his free arm around Spock while keeping the other in place. He pulled the other's face to his chest, resting his head on Spock's. "Of course. You only had to ask in the first place. I would never be angry to comfort you, or listen to you." He stated softly, not daring to move.

Spock relaxed his muscles, unaware of what to say or give back. However, he sensed a relaxed tone coming from his friend, and decided that that was enough. He hoped this position was also benefiting Jim. "I appreciate your kindness. I will take your words into consideration.. I find this very relaxing and healing." The Vulcan admitted under his breath, letting his eyelids shield his vision.

He could never exactly figure out what caused his distress, but it no longer mattered. Being in the moment with Jim had given him a glimpse at happier emotions. Emotions that his friend provided him with. The physical contact caused his skin to tingle, and his heart to fill with joy.

"It's never a problem. I will forever be here for you, Spock. It's all we have." He said, his words sounding like poetry and home.

"Jim?" Spock questioned suddenly, looking up at his lifelong companion.

"Yes, Spock? Is everything okay?" He answered, looking directly into his eyes.

"I think I understand what love is now." Spock responded softly with a nod.

"I think I do too." The blonde agreed with a faint smile, holding Spock just a bit tighter.

The only thing that mattered was not the sadness Spock had felt previously. It was not the shattered mirror scattered among the night sky. It was not the darkness and cold that engulfed the room around them.

What mattered was the pure admiration the two completely opposite beings held for each other. Their hearts filled with each other, and their souls bonded. 

With bodies mended, eyes closed, and hearts open, they slowly laid back onto the welcoming pillows.

"Rest easy now. I'm here, always." Jim repeated, continuously holding the other close to his heart. 

"And I for you, T'hy'la."


End file.
